The purpose of this special ground defense workshop was to provide extra instruction and techniques to the women black belts and high belts who will be teaching the June 26, 2010 Women’s Self Defense Workshop in Canton, CT – a community service event sponsored by Yu’s Academy of Martial Arts and Soroptimist International of Farmington Valley whose mission is to improve the lives of women and girls in our local community and around the world.

This was perhaps the best and most important class that I’ve ever taken. Why? Because I was able to “feel the fear and do it anyway.”

I have always worried about the possibility of being thrown to the ground. This classic rape position sends fear to most women that I know. I worry about falling down and hurting myself and worse yet, being in this most vulnerable position.  As a result of this fear, I have done my best to avoid even practicing these scenarios or thinking about what I would do in this potential situation. Tonight, in this safe, training environment, I couldn’t wiggle out of it. It was time to conquer my fear and learn how truly powerful I am.

Master Harms first set us up with a few bits of reality about violent attacks against women. Most attacks will end up on the ground at some point or another, he suggested. He emphasized how important it is to keep a cool head during an attack. “You must think while you are falling,” he reminded us. “You want to land in a good position to defend yourself.”

The worst position and how to correct it

The worst position you can ever be in is face down with your legs and arms flat on the ground. (see photo on right). You have no strength or power to defend yourself. If you find yourself in this position, you want to find a way to flip over and face your attacker. You want your legs and arms in the defensive position, with one knee up between you and your attacker.

Flip over and face your attacker

Here’s a video from Chemin Alldredge demonstrating how to keep your guard up while on the ground using your legs and hands in the defensive position. This position gives you great visibility and power to drive back your attacker, until such time as you can get up and run away. If you attacker has you on the ground and is close to your face and chest, this defensive position is your best shot. Unlike a turtle on her back, you can be strong and fierce in this position!

Forget the ladylike behavior – it’s time to get fierce

Master Harms had us practice using loud, tiger like growls and grunts during our defensive rounds. We practiced shouted “No – Back Off.” He encouraged us to use profanity – those four-letter words that we have been told for decades are not polite to use in public. This is hard for some women – to find their voice and to let their inner-warrior out. I can’t emphasize enough how critical this is to potentially saving your life. Click through to our web page “Learn to Defend Yourself” and watch the video from Dr. Ruthless – a small petite, unassuming woman who has found her voice and is empowering other women to fight back and win.

Turning the Tables on Your Attacker

The goal in your self defense is to turn the tables on your attacker; to shift your position from victim to defender to attacker. The bad guy will be very surprised by the fierceness of your response and very sorry that he choose you to pick on.

Here’s a photo series that shows how a woman being attacked can flip over and change her outcome. Black Belt Kathleen Oyanadel is playing the role of the attacker in this simulation.

What will you do next?
The hardest part about hosting a free women’s self defense workshop is actually getting the women and girls to show up. You’d think it would be a no-brainer. The price is right. It’s fun and empowering. It’s important to know how to do. So, what’s the deal? Why do women shy away from this kind of work? This is the perfect opportunity to face your fear and do it anyway – and to learn how to do it in a safe, supportive, training environment. Don’t wait until it’s too late. You must take action and learn to defend yourself now. You must come from a place of strength!

As a young girl, I grew up hearing many well-meaning cautions like “don’t talk to strangers,” “beware of bad men” and “don’t go out alone at night.”, ” Stay in groups – there’s safety in numbers.” I remember after college, when I was sharing a flat in San Francisco with my friend Sally, I used to barricade my bedroom door with furniture, to prevent an intruder from attacking me at night. Sally, on the other hand, had experienced a house fire when she was a young girl. She wanted all the passage ways clear so she could safely escape the building. We were an odd couple.

When I first went to New York City after graduating from college, I walked around the city expecting to be mugged. I packed my purse carefully, leaving out the special things that I didn’t want to lose. I imagine that my body language must have been a dead give away to the people around me. “She is scared.” Thankfully, nothing bad happened.

It took me until I was 40 years of age until I tackled that fear and began to learn some self-defense techniques and practice them until they became second nature (that’s on on-going goal!). I found my voice and learned to use it to create more power and energy in my movement. I learned to stand tall and look people in the eye. My posture is much more confident now, since I learned the defensive stance. I am a very different woman than the one that was cowering around the New York city streets some 20 years ago.

On February 14, 2009, my husband Byron and I tested for our black belts in Tae Kwon Do (the art of punching and kicking). We were granted the award on May of that year. (photo shown here was during my black belt test, demonstrating a self defense move with the help of my friend Dorien Boon van Ostade). After seven years of study and regular attendance, I had not only achieved this unexpected goal, but I had found a new passion: helping other women and girls find their voice and learn to defend themselves.

Find your voice and change your life

To that end, I invite all the women and girls who are reading this blog (and the people who really care about them) to join me on Saturday, June 26, 2010 from 2:00-4:00pm in Canton, Connecticut for an introductory women’s self defense workshop. If you live outside the CT area, then you should look up and visit the local martial arts school in your area. Take a few classes or sign up and become a full-fledged student.

Our Best for Women Self Defense Workshop is a community service project and is co-sponsored by Soroptimist International of Farmington Valley (of which I am an enthusiastic member. Learn more about this non-profit women’s service club at www.Soroptimist.org) and also sponsored by Yu’s Academy of Martial Arts with schools in Canton and Simsbury, Connecticut.

More resources:

Peruse our photo gallery from past womens self defense workshops.

Watch the amazing video from Dr. Ruthless

Click on the image and watch our TV interview on Better Connecticut with anchors Kara Sundlun and Scott Haney. Kathleen Oyanadel and I demonstrated some basic self defense techniques. This video was filmed to promote a women’s self defense workshop we did last year.

Read the interesting blog article contributed by Soroptimist and Rotarian Dorien Boon van ostade about why parents should pay more attention to their daughter’s safety than the prom dress she wants to wear to the year end school party.

Please help me spread the word to other women and girls about the importance of learning to defend yourself. Every part of your body is potentially a weapon that can be used to PROTECT yourself. You must give yourself permission to be strong, powerful and fierce when the occasion calls for it.

Please leave your comments below and share some of your experience and views on the subject of self-defense.